Sunday, June 28

Eating Out

 
We went out to eat with Uncle Jeremy and Aunt Theresa a month or so ago.
Since they asked US, they had to choose the place.
Should be easy, right?
You're hungry.  You have $$.  Go eat.
Not so.
We went to a place where we could look out the window into the
parking lot.  A guy and his wife drove up in a truck and never got out.
It was apparent that they were NOT getting along.
Dinner and a show, right?
They were there for quite a while, obviously arguing.
Us four decided that one of them didn't want to eat at Riverpoint.
They eventually left.
Fine, we'll go home and eat a bowl of cereal.
 

Well, we do eat out as often as we can.
No, we don't eat out every night.
It's fun, and sometimes cheaper than going to Dillard's.
Except sometimes, it's hard to pick where you want to end up.
 
 
I figure, with all the resources and energy put into just choosing a place to eat....
we could put a fence up around Texas.
{not a bad idea, but that's another issue}
Driving around, going back and forth, pros and cons,
this or that.....on and on and on.
Half of the traffic jams in big cities are probably
people driving around trying to decide where to eat.
 

Not KFC, I don't like raw chicken and lukewarm coleslaw.
Never McDonalds unless you just want French Fries.
No more Red Robin.  The last time I was there, it was NOT YUMMMMM.
Red Lobster? No thanks.  The food is sometimes questionable
and the service right along with it.
El Chico? too salty for you?
El Toro? Can't even walk around in that place. 
 They have 4 waiters/waitresses
for every *1* customer.
La Casona? Every time I go into that place I think of the deep
fried avocado I got one time.  It still haunts me.
Roadhouse? I hate C/W music. 
But I like their Roadkill.....
Steak and Shake? Not for Hobbits.
Top China? Well, the place is clean. It's no wonder those people are skinny,
have you seen what they think is cake?
And jello is so yesterday.
Carino's? It's kind of dangerous for me to go in there now.
Cheese and cream sauces aren't agreeing with me.
And I'm not eating chicken with tomato junk on it.
Chili's? I dunno.  Ours seems a little teeny-boppish or something.
Gringo's?  Well, if I happen to be in Pearland, that's where I might choose.
If I happen to be in Freeport, that's where I might choose.
It's great if you don't mind the wait.
 

 
Café Luxe?  I'll go if I can share dessert with Lydia.
Cheesecake Factory? Don't say cheesecake.....
Olive Garden? Let's do something different, let ME put
the dressing on my salad.
And get me something other than that tart see through stuff.
HEY! How about Ci-ci's?  NAH. How.About.No.
Ryan's? Please, no.  Well, their fried chicken is good.
But don't get anything else.
Not even a plate.
bleh
You could go to Luby's and get liver and onions.
Baytown? We only go there after a hurricane.
Golden Corral? The closest one that I know of is in Galveston.
There is the most WEIRD assortment of people you will ever
see in one place. Too weird.  No thanks.

 
So, where do you want to eat?
Taco Bell?
Or we could just go to the new HEB
 and pick up $37 worth of
deli items. 
 
When I was a kid, we didn't eat out often at all.
When we did, it was an occasion to remember.
There was an A&W Root Beer stand with the real glass mugs in
the town I was born in.  Now that was cool beans.
There was a little place called the Trail Café.
They would bring the salad dressing to you in a little
contraption that held three different kinds.
Italian? French? Thousand Island?
Then they'd take it to the next table.
Please don't sneeze in it. Please.
Who decided to replace little packages of crackers
with croutons?  Did it come to a vote somewhere
and I missed it?  Or did the Supreme Court just pass
a law, while we were all sleeping?
 


During the Summer, I would stay with my cousin that lived
in Medicine Lodge, Kansas.
We shoveled rabbit droppings under cages for $$.
Uncle Bill paid us each enough for us to go to the restaurant on the highway.
We got roast beef on white bread, mashed potatoes with brown
gravy poured all over it.  I remember asking the waitress
what roast beef was.  derrrr
I guess that was easy to decide, it was there or Dairy Queen.
DQ only had ice cream and cold stuff.
Not supper.
 
 
I came up with a great plan for those of you that can't
agree on a place to go eat.
You can call me and I will be glad to tell you where to
go and what to order.
I will also name your kids for you.
~~~~OR~~~
The husband names three places he is willing to go,
and willing to pay for.
Then the wife chooses one place out of those three.
OR the wife can choose three places she wants to eat,
and the husband can pick when one he
can afford.
 

Most of all, decide before you leave the house.
If you don't, you might end up using half a tank of gas driving
around the county.
You also might end up having an argument about it,
and then you have to go back home and eat cereal and milk.
OR, you could very well end up being the parking lot entertainment.
And you don't want that.
 
 
If you ever drive through Central Kansas,
go to Carriage Crossing in Yoder.
Their cinnamon rolls are HUGE.
But don't get their pie.
They think it's great, but it ain't.
 
Here's a quote by Woody Allen, I'm not a fan of his, but this was funny:
The food here is terrible....and the portions are too small.
 
So, if you DO get to eat out, try not to complain.
 
 

4 comments:

Rebecca said...

My goodness, lady! You DO get around. Once again. You are hilarious. And talented.

Michele McEntire said...

.....I do like to eat out....

Anonymous said...

Well my favorite place to eat is Jasons Deli in Wichita....organic choices and lots of salad fixins & at the end you get free soft serve ice cream and these delicious gingerbread muffins! My favorite drive to is SONIC! Love the onion rings & shakes when I am wanting to junk out. Kristi

Heather McEntire said...

If you're in North Pole you go to Pagoda. Or they vote you out of the state. Seriously.